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Balance

Hello All,
I hope life is treating you well. Aside from a bout of “spring fever,” things are good here in my neck of the woods. Now that the weather is mild and sunny, it is difficult to stay inside and write. Most of this week has been spent outdoors and lunching with friends. Then when I got home, my computer sat accusingly on my desk, bidding me to finish the final three chapters of my work-in-progress. Although the mind was willing, the spirit was not.

At first I felt guilty for ignoring my characters and the world I left in limbo. Then I remembered the obstacles I recently overcame and the balance I’ve achieved in my life. Although my story is difficult to share because it shows my vulnerable side, I decided there may be one person out there who can learn from my experience. Over the last year, I have dedicated most of my days to my novel. When I wasn’t writing I was thinking about my characters. Little else mattered. I turned down lunch dates with friends, declined professional opportunities and essentially cut the world out of my life. Don’t get me wrong, my family has always come first, so my evenings and weekends were devoted to them.   Otherwise, I would have had no human interaction.

After about a year of self-induced solitary confinement, I started feeling overwhelmed and blue. Since I wrote from home, I did not put much effort into my appearance and it deteriorated fast.  I went from wearing a cute bob cut to a ponytail.  Makeup was a thing of the past and my wardrobe extended to a different color sweat suit for each day of the week. I gained about fifteen pounds and I felt haggard and old. The words stopped flowing and somewhere along the way, my dream job of writing had turned into a chore.

If not for my son’s wake up call, who knows how long I would have continued on this downward spiral. One afternoon, my nine year old son commented to his brothers that I had switched up my wardrobe. He said, “Look guys, mom’s wearing jeans instead of sweats. Is it a special holiday or something?” Although I did not appreciate my son’s sarcasm, his comment caused me to take a step back and look at myself.

I realized my life my lacked BALANCE. Too much work and no play made Andrea a dull girl. I decided to do something about it. First, I went to the beauty parlor and got my hair cut in a reverse bob. Then, I joined Weight Watchers and started an exercise routine. I also joined a writer’s group and reconnected with my friends. Last, but certainly not least, I look in the mirror every morning and say, “Today will be a good day.”

The power of positive thinking combined with a few minor life changes has made a world of difference for me. Since January, I have lost thirteen pounds. I’m three chapters away from completing the first draft of my work-in-progress.  However, I have limited my writing time to four days a week and I am happy to say my novel has become a joy again.

Lesson learned here? Although an author’s need to create may be strong, it is important to maintain a balanced perspective. Writing is a solitary journey, but it doesn’t have to be a lonely one. Exercise, enjoy hobbies and most of all, keep family and friends close. Have any of you had a similar experience? If so, I’d be interested to know how you overcame the obstacles. Until next time, happy writing.

Comments

  1. I woke up this morning thinking the very same thing. Balance balance balance!! Yours is the very post I needed to read! Thanks for sharing your story. I'll get back to you on how it goes for me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Good luck Karen G. I'm glad my post helped. All the best.

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  3. Your observations really resonated with me! Since starting to write fulltime (some days on paid work, some on The Novel), I've lived in fear of becoming a shapeless troll with zero social skills. To avoid this happening I've taken on a few new experiences:
    - going to the gym two or three times a week (hard work to start at the age of 50, but I can feel, if not see, the results)
    - joining a book group to force myself to read outside my comfort zone and meet new people
    - relearning the horseriding skills I had when I was a teenager
    - throwing myself into a new hobby, keeping chickens. They are amusing, friendly creatures and going outside for just ten minutes in their company helps me unwind both mentally and physically during the day (as well as providing the satisfaction of collecting still-warm eggs)
    - reminding myself frequently that I'm doing what I want to do, and I should be very grateful for that fact alone!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks for your comments Janet, and welcome to Aspiring Novelists. It sounds like we have a lot in common. Horseback riding is a wonderful hobby. Unfortunately, it's been years since I've been involved in the sport. Although keeping chickens would not have been my first choice for relaxation, if it makes you happy then that is all that counts. I think you've got the "balance" thing down. Good luck on your novel.

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