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WIll It Ever Be Good Enough For Me?



 For this month's Insecure Writer's Support Group post, hosted by the gracious Alex J. Cavanaugh,  I would like to discuss insecurities about pitching my novel.

 After two long years of  hard work, I've finally arrived at a place where I'm pleased with my story.  Although this should make me happy, it doesn't.  I can't get rid of that nagging voice in my mind which keeps asking, what if my perceptions are skewed?  There have been times where I wrote a chapter and thought it was brilliant, only to learn it stunk when I read it a couple days later.  What if this is the case with my story? 

Although the feedback I've received about my novel has been stellar, I can't help but wonder if the readers were being overly generous. It's possible they stretched the truth in order to save my feelings.  Even if the feedback was sincere, it didn't come from experts.  The beta's could have overlooked plot holes, one dimensional characters etc.   Since I'm so close to the piece it's difficult to look at it objectively.  

Now, I've put myself in a position to pitch my novel before I'm sure it's ready.  Although I've grown a crocodile like skin over the years, in two days, I will face a professional in the field.  Somehow I have to still my shaky hands, slow my pounding heart and dry my perspiring fore head enough to give an interesting pitch.  Part of me would be over the moon if the agent liked what she heard and wanted a partial, but the other part, a more insecure part, would sweat the submission.  The pragmatist in me says either she will like what she reads or she won't, but the romantic in me is filled with hope. 

Am I alone in my feelings?  Or are there others who experienced similar fears?  If so, how did you overcome them?  Until next time, happy writing.    

Comments

  1. I'm jealous you have grown a crocodile skin! Mine's still about a micrometer and as impenetrable as silk :(

    It's scary - I know! - submitting that story. Keep your head up and best of luck!

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  2. You are so not alone. I can totally relate to this, but it's all worth it in the end. Keep that hope.

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  3. Good luck. I'm a big sissy about my work, trust your beta readers and try to believe in your work. I iknow it's this thing that you think is great and awful at the same time. Hopefully the part of you that thinks it's great will come out when you make your pitch.

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  4. I'm totally with you - pitching is terrifying! What if I don't know what I'm talking about? What if I suck? Ahhh, it's awful. But keep at it - it'll all be worth it one day when you see your book on the shelf.
    P.S. Great blog. Glad I stopped by :)
    - http://pensuasion.blogspot.com/

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  5. You're definitely not alone. This part of the game is the worst for me and will always be the worst. I think it's something we all just have to get used to. It's stressful. It will always be stressful and will always conjure self-doubt. Wish I could be more helpful, but I haven't even found a way to calm myself down in this situation. :-/ Btw, thanks for dropping by my blog! I'm now following you too.

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  6. Just now finding time to blog hop in search of fellow insecure writers!

    We all feel that way about our writing but pitching is a win-win situation. It's definitely a win if someone loves it enough to consider but still a win if they don't because at least you get a better idea on where you need to be with your writing.

    I am just sickeningly upbeat sometimes.ha Hope everything went well!

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  7. You just have to go for it. And since this is Sunday, you've obviously faced that person already. Remember, it's just one person's opinion, so don't take a rejection to mean your work isn't good enough.

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  8. Thanks to everyone who offered words of support on my post for the Insecure Writer's Group. I tried to respond to your comments many times last weekend, but for some odd reason, my remarks kept disappearing into cyber space. I appreciate all of the kind words more than you know.

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