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Insecure Writer's Support Group





Hello fellow bloggers, hope you had a productive  week   Mine has been devoted to writing a love scene. I really struggle with these, or in the case of this post, am insecure about them.  Not because I'm uncomfortable with romance, but mainly because building sexual tension between two people, in prose, is difficult.  Too many cheesy euphemisms for body parts or  flowery phrases, can  make a scene more comical than romantic.  Not enough of them and the character's seem wooden and one-dimensional.

Vanes Hart at The Romance Studi says love scenes should reflect the character's emotions and reactions to the intimacy, without giving the reader a play-by-play on every touch.  Well, this is easier said than done.   I've devoted the last three days to the scene in my book and I'm still not sure it's right.   Have any of you struggled with  love scenes?  If so, I'd be interested in to know how you overcame the problem.  Until next time, happy writing.

Comments

  1. Hart seems to have good advice but it is definitely easier said than done. I have avoided them in my work so far. It's a tricky one. That maybe my next challenge. You seem to be determined to get it right which is good sign. Cheers

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    1. Thank, Clay. I'll look for that challenge. Hey, practice makes perfect.

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  2. I spend a lot of time rewriting love scenes. It's so hard to get the right balance, as you said, between cheesy and chemistry.

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    1. No doubt, Johanna. Sometimes I wonder why we do this to ourselves. Thanks for stopping in.

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  3. I usually write epic fantasy, but I also write romance under a pen name. I have the same trouble with sex scenes. I write them with correct anatomical names in the first draft and try to add tension in second draft. It helps you to move past a difficult part.

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    1. That's one way to do it, Susan.

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    2. Sorry,didn't get to finish, Susan. Computer went nuts. Framing it first then filling in the blanks might work. Thanks for stopping in.

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  4. It is hard. Pardon the pun :)

    I try to stay deep in the POV character's head and amplify the sensory elements. And remember action/reaction. If you're in her head, he has to do something before she reacts. Her reaction needs to be feeling and emotional as well as spur her to an action. The more I write, the kinkier this is sounding.

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    1. LOL, Carol. Maybe you hit on the key element here. Staying deep inside the POV character's head, i.e., living through it with them might keep the cheesyness at bay. Thanks for stopping in and commenting. Take care.

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  5. I'm struggling a lot with romantic and sexual scenes. Having typed that, I realize I'm talking about both my personal life and my writing. =) So I appreciate this post. I try to write the scenes as though they are snippets from Sex and The City (which has the tone I aim for). I can't say how much it helps, because I'm very much stalled. At least, it makes for a less daunting process.

    Thanks for visiting and commenting. It's great to meet you through the IWSG.

    Be well.
    xoRobyn

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    1. Nice to meet you as well, Rawknrobyn. Sex and The City is great. I loved that show. I'm not sure I could pull it off though. Two very different voices. Good luck on your love scenes.

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  6. You are so right about naming body parts giving it a comical feel. Actually, for Three Daves, I was going for comical in some of the sex scenes, so those were a blast to write. But I totally agree with focusing on character emotion and reaction and avoid overused tingling & such. My advice is just write it out with no worries and then on subsequent rereads see where you giggle or roll your eyes and fix those parts.

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    1. Good advice, Nicki. I have a feeling I'll be rolling my eyes a lot.(:

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  7. Yeah; it is a difficult balance. I find I have to just write it as it comes - cheesey, cliche, too graphic, or too sappy - and worry about getting the balance later with editing. Sometimes I have to rewrite several times, over a period of time.

    Once I get it all wrote down, its easier to concentrate on filling in the rest of the story, and as I put distance from the initial writing, its easier to see what needs worked on.

    Just like any other part of writing/editing. The trick is to look at it with some objectivity :) And read published authors that write well in that area.

    .......dhole

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    1. Donna, sounds like we have very, very similar approaches to writing. The only difference between us is, sometimes I think the first draft is brilliant. Then, when I return to it a few days later, I realize it's crap. That's when I begin the filling in process.(:

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  8. I SOOOO struggle with the same thing. I hate cheesy romance scenes more than I can say - especially those I keep reading in YA novels. Ugh. Good luck with it!

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    1. Thanks, S.L., I need all the luck I can get, LOL. You're right, I've read some really cheesy love scenes in YA novels. Maybe I'll try my hand at one next. Seems the bar is set a bit lower in those than adult books.

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  9. Great topic! It's a delicate balance isn't it? I thought I did okay with it in my screenplay but now that I'm novelizing the same story I find it harder to convey the right emotions without being too over the top or amateurish. That's why I've put it off for a while and focused on the 'almost-sex' scene :-)

    I'm guessing the key is to know your characters and their POV. There's a million different love scenes out there and the best way to make them sound interesting and original is to describe them through the eyes of an interesting and original character. (Hope I'm not oversimplifying) Good luck with it, and keep us posted!

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    1. Hi Insomniac. Thanks for stopping by. I can see how it would be difficult to transition from a screenplay to a novel. Shows how diverse you are. I like your point about the "almost sex scene" it would certainly build tension. Maybe I'll play with it and see what I can come up with. Take care.

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  10. I've not had to deal with that yet...and If I play my cards right maybe I never will. :)

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    1. Please, let me know how you avoid love scenes. If there is a male and female in the story, and they are of similar age and occupation, etc, it's hard not to bring them together. It seems like the characters won't let me avoid it.(:

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  11. I have struggled with this. What works best for me is studying others scenes you loved while reading. Really focus of what they wrote. How they wrote it. Read it over and over again.

    Blessings,

    Kym

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